TITLE: Except Me
AUTHOR: AmnesiaSparkles (me!)
NAME(S): Margaret Conway, goes by Maggie or Maggs (again, me! Blatant, I know, but fun, and you know what? I don't care, I do like this character. I don't think she's that bad, as far as Sues go, and she's got a lot of redeemable qualities).
AFFILIATION: friend of Ducks
HAIR COLOUR: dark brown with auburn highlights (um...from being in the sun? Or because she's a Sue?)
EYE COLOUR: brown, but she wears green contacts
SPECIAL POSESSIONS/HOBBIES/TALENTS: She's a music junkie. She doesn't play, but she knows a lot about popular music, and she writes lyrics that hardly ever see the light of day.
HISTORY: She is Charlie's sister, younger by two years. She's known most of the Ducks since she was little, and Fulton is her best friend. She's had a crush on Averman ever since she started noticing boys.
CONNECTIONS TO CHARACTERS: Charlie's sister (I know, guys! I'm sorry!), Fulton's best friend (again...sorry!), and Averman's love interest (because I, too, have been crushing on Averman since I started to notice boys).
DOES S/HE PLAY HOCKEY? IF SO DETAILS: She does not. She can't skate to save her life. Not to mention, she's not really into sports, and only goes to the hockey games to ogle Averman.
NOTES: First of all, this fic will finally be updated (and finished soon, I hope), now that I have computer/internet access again). As I said, I'm not ashamed of this character. First fics are for getting all that junk out of your system, right? Plus, I don't think it's too horribly written (there are some grammatical errors, but I was impatient and spell check wasn't working). And you know? Writing myself into this story was my instant answer to lack of Averman stories and it's been really fun. Feel free to kill Maggs, but I'll defend her. Yes, she is a Sue, but she's my Sue!
SAMPLE OF THE STORY AND LINK: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2178090/1/
My stomach is in knots as I pull up in front of Averman's house. As I walk up to the door, I try to remember the last time I was this nervous. Honestly? I can't. I can't remember ever feeling quite this apprehensive.
Averman's stepdad, Frank, answers the door. "Hello, Maggie," he says, ushering me inside. "Les is in his room. You know the way."
I try to calm the butterflies in my stomach as I make my way through the living room and kitchen, until I'm at the back of the house in front of Averman's bedroom door. I raise my hand and knock. I can't believe I let my brother talk me into this. This is going to be a disaster, I can feel it.
"Maggie, hey," Averman says with a grin. Oh, God. Whenever he smiles at me, I could die, and today is no exception. I feel myself get weak in the knees as I smile back, trying to match his apparent confidence and failing miserably. "Come on in." He closes the door behind us and gestures to his bed. "Have a seat."
He plops down on the bed and I follow suit. "So what's up?"
I look down at my feet. "Nothing," I mutter.
He looks down at the ground, too. Neither of us say anything for a while, and I think it's almost nice, us sharing this silence together.
Averman coughs, breaking the silence. "I want to talk about last night," he says, finally.
I really don't. I really don't want to be here, and I really don't want this to be happening. "What about it?" I throw my glance around his room, looking at the floor, at the walls, at anything but his face.
He touches my arm and my resolve weakens. I look up, brown-green eyes meeting blue. "Do you like me?"
A lump forms in my throat and I feel like I'm going to cry. I don't say anything, just nod, after a minute.
He looks away, then back at me. "This changes everything," he says, quietly.
The way he says it makes everything sound so horrible that I try desperately to backpeddle.
"It doesn't have to." I detect a pleading note in my voice. "You, uh, you can forget all this, and I'll go home, and everything will be like before. Like it used to be."
Averman shakes his head. "We can't do that," he says, a lopsided grin appearing on his face.
Everyone I know says I'm hard-headed to a fault. I'm stubborn; I will challenge everything that doesn't go my way. I suppose they're right, for I find myself demanding an explanation. "Why can't we?"
"Because," he says, simply. He falls silent for a moment before asking, "How long have we known each other?"
I look at him, startled. "Forever." I can't remember a time in my life without Averman in it. Even before hockey, he and Charlie were inseparable. And, since the two year gap in our ages has never seemed quite that large, I was usually in their presence, as well. I've never really tried to make friends of my own. I always figured, why bother? Charlie never minded when I tagged along, so his friends were always my friends, too. "Ever since I can remember."
"Exactly," he agrees. "You were always there. And I never really thought about it, you know? You were just...Maggie. Charlie's little sister. And then..." He stops, and I find this unacceptable.
I touch his hand, jumping as a wave of static electricity runs through me. "Hey. Then what?"
"Then I started thinking about it. And you were still Maggie and you were still Charlie's sister and you were still the same girl I'd always known and grown up with, but it's like you were more than that, too. And I didn't know how I felt about that. I wasn't sure how to deal with it."
Jeez-oh-man. All the fantasies I've been harboring since I was nine are coming true, and I realize that he's right. This does change everything. "Is that why you never said anything?"
He nods. "Yeah, and I didn't want things to be weird or anything."
There are a million jumbled thoughts bouncing around in my head. "This is weird, though," I admit, trying to sort my thoughts into coherent little piles. "How do we fix it?"
Averman shrugs. "What do you want to do?" Great. He's leaving it all up to me.
Slowly, I shake my head. "I don't know. I've never done this before."
"Well, do you want to try this with me?" he asks. "Maybe see where things go?"
"I don't know," I repeat, and it dawns on me that I really don't know. I don't know how to tell him that I've never so much as kissed a boy before. I don't know how to be a good girlfriend. All I do know, really, is that suddenly there are all these what-ifs presented to me, and I'm finding them more than a little scary.
"Well, why not?"
I sigh. "I don't know," I say for a third time. "What happens if this doesn't work out? What if it's too weird or something? What if things get bad and awkward and we're not friends anymore?" This last thought terrifies me. I don't think I could handle it if I lost Averman's friendship. "What if--"
"What if we're okay and things go great?" he counters. "Maggie, we're always going to be friends. No matter what happens. I mean, I'm not trying to pressure you," he adds, taking my hand in his. "I just want you to know that I'll always be here."
I nod, biting my lower lip. "I just...Can I just think about this for a little bit?" I have an incredible urge to run, to escape to someplace safe where I can fully process the events of the past twenty-four hours. Like I said, I'm scared, okay, and a little confused, and I want nothing more than to go somewhere else and just think and try to figure everything out.
"Oh," Averman says. "Okay." He looks so disappointed and I want to cry for doing this to him. It's on the tip of my tongue to tell him never mind, I didn't mean it, I take it back, but I think about it for a second too long and I have to go.
Realization sinks in as I drive away. "What an idiot," I tell myself. I bang the steering wheel in frustration. Good God, how absolutely stupid am I? I had everything within my grasp and I gave it up because I think too much.
At the Reed house, I find the spare key under the Welcome mat and let myself in. After grabbing a Sprite from the kitchen, I follow the sounds of Aerosmith to the den, where Fulton, Dean, and Adam are playing Tiger Woods 2005. Stepping in front of the television, I strike a pose and play an air guitar riff along with Joe Perry. "Hello, boys," I greet them.
"You know," Adam says with a smirk, "I wouldn't mind that as much if you were wearing the same outfit you had on last night."
I shift the can of soda from hand to hand. "Banks, I will throw this at you," I threaten.
Dean whistles. "A little hostile today, huh?"
Fulton nods in agreement. "Why aren't you with Averman?" he wants to know.
I sink down in the beanbag by his feet. "I," I begin, pausing for effect, "am an idiot."
"Well, yeah," Fulton laughs, "but that doesn't have anything to do with what I just asked."
I punch him in the calf, which doesn't really do anything except make my hand hurt. "You're an asshole, Fulton Reed," I inform him. I briefly consider "accidentally" spilling my drink on him. "Why am I even friends with you?"
"Who else would you hang out with?" Adam points out. "I'm not trying to be a dick or anything," he's quick to add when Dean elbows him. "I'm just saying, is all."
"Anyway," I change the subject, "I want to play golf." I grab the controller out of Fulton's hands.
He grabs it back. "Not until you tell me what happened."
"I'm stupid, okay?" I take a long sip of my Sprite. "And my retardation is bound to render me boyfriendless for the rest of my life."
"You thought too much about it, didn't you?" He knows me too well, and for a minute, I resent that.
Adam raises his hand. "Question."
"Whatever." I take a deep breath, exhaling loudly. "Ask away."
"What the hell are you guys talking about?"
"Nothing. It doesn't matter." I lean back against the couch, then change my mind, deciding to explain. I sit back up. "So, okay. So, Charlie calls Averman up today and tells him I'm coming over, so he's expecting me and I have no choice but to actually go over there and talk to him. And you know what he says?"
"Actually, yeah," Fulton replies. "I know the whole pre-story, remember?"
I choose to ignore him. "He likes me, too!" I tell Dean and Adam. "But I'm stupid and I stopped to actually think about things and I got kinda freaked and I bolted." I cringe inwardly, remembering the mess I caused. If I weren't so dumb, I'd still be at Averman's, and if I knew how to play my cards right, I'd probably have my first kiss by now. "I just started thinking about all these what-ifs."
"Like?" Dean prompts.
"Like, what if I suck at this whole girlfriend thing?" I answer. "What if I'm a bad kisser and he breaks up with me? What if we get all weird and can't hang out anymore? What if this is just a really bad idea and something happens and we stop being friends?" I'm on the verge of tears again, and I hate myself for being so stupid and overemotional.
Adam slides down off the couch. "Hey, Maggs, it's okay," he says gently, giving me a hug. He breaks into a broad smile. "I'll help you practice with the kissing thing."
I smile through my almost-tears. "Thanks, Ads, but no thanks."
He pretends to be offended. "Are you telling me you'd rather make out with Averman than me?"
"That's exactly what she's saying, Einstein," Fulton retorts.
Dean holds his hands up. "Whoa, wait. Maggie, trust me," he says. "I've seen these guys in the locker room. Neither one of them are worth making out with."
Now I think Adam really is offended. "I don't know what you're talking about," he mutters. "I'm fucking hot."
I look at him like he has the word "idiot" stamped on his forehead. "No," I disagree. "You're just Adam."
"And you're just Maggie," he throws back.
I dismiss him with a "Whatever," and grab the Playstation controller back from Fulton. "I'm way prettier than you. Now let's play some golf, okay?"
"What are you going to do about Averman?" Fulton asks me.
I shrug. "I'm playing as Justin Timberlake," I tell the guys, ignoring the question.
Fulton kicks me lightly in the back. "You gonna answer me?"
I turn around. "I'll figure something out, okay?" I tell him. I turn back to face the TV and settle myself in the beanbag. "I always do."